what broke your heart

closing my eyes to find

yours staring back into mine

i wake panicked

to find an empty room

the way you kissed me

moonlight across your back

moving to the sound

of a sleepless summer night

your pressure less frantic

your touch less stormy

your heart less cold

i close my eyes

his face pressed against

my back hands tied

across my chest

my heart stops

shaking off the thought

i try to let you in

to unfold my dark

corners

yet, even overtime

he still wins

forced entry,

slick tongue

rough hands

et et etched inside me

tangled in webs of roots

entwined with walls

so high i can’t see the sky

millions upon millions

of shards is my healing

broken heart cutting me inside

trying to learn to let him go

dying inside

tight chest

unable to breathe in new air

limp and scared

of what comes next

light turning to darkness

wind blowing

dirt throwing

buried in the ground

hands cold

eyes closed

this is what death looks like

the last chapter of the relationship

it didn’t end the way most things do

there wasn’t words

or screams to look back on

it wasn’t long or dragged out

it didn’t cut like the

knives i used to drag

across my skin

it wasn’t crippling

it wasn’t anything

it was absolute and final

silent and haunting

it crept back in voided spaces

loud voices in quiet rooms

the silence louder than breaking plates

it was more lonely

then the loneliness

i felt with you

it might be over soon

water seeping

through pinholes

to the sound of

your breaking heart

against the window

sunlight rising

between cracks

birds singing

“it’s a trap”

can you hear them singing?

ashes

you run your hands through my hair

to keep me close

you whisper in my ear

making me smile all alone

you call me your sad girl

with pretty eyes that drown

you

you trace my skin

scorching me to

remind me I’m yours

but were you ever really mine?

it hurts less

my arms are

reaching,

grasping ,

pulling,

The wind is

blowing,

knocking ,

pushing,

my legs are

failing,

crawling,

stretching,

my mouth forms the

pleas

the wind drowns me out

i try ,

try ,

try

but im already under

let go,

give in,

close eyes

It’s the only way i know